Confidence

Whether you come from a council estate or a country estate, your success will be determined by your own confidence and fortitude.

Michelle Obama 

Many people regard me as a very confident person. There are a few areas where I still have the occasional wobble, but I definitely feel most confident when I am coaching or dancing the tango.  But it wasn't always like that.

When I started dancing the tango years ago, I had that lovely first flurry of enthusiasm where I was learning and had the permission to get it wrong. I felt a bit of a clumsy oaf occasionally when I trod on someone's toes, but hey, I was learning. The problem was when I had been dancing for a while, hit a plateau and lost my confidence. I felt that after all the classes I had attended, I ‘should' be doing better. I booked myself a private lesson which in my mind I saw as a bit ‘make or break’ - I decided if it didn’t go well, I would just give up tango and walk away. Luckily, I had two really great teachers who gave me some important pointers and I ended the class with a fabulous dance.

I didn’t get to be an expert dancer in that single class. I am not an expert dancer now, although I am becoming accomplished.  But I know I can dance well enough to have a fabulous time with some great partners (or at least will be able to once we can meet up again!). 

I didn’t walk away from the tango. (In fact in time, my confidence in the tango opened up the possibility of starting my own business.) I just recognised that as a dancer (and as a coach), I have something unique to offer. Not necessarily better, finer, more brilliant that anyone else, just unique to me.

If you hit a moment when your confidence has momentarily disappeared, remind yourself of all the things you have accomplished, learnt, created. Remind yourself that these things didn’t just happen, but needed you to learn, to practise, to experiment - and yes, sometimes, often, to get it wrong. Confidence is built on all your experience, your particular talents, your resilience and your mindset.

To be confident, recognise your uniqueness, and open up all kinds of possibilities for yourself. 

If confidence (or lack of) is stopping you, perhaps I can help. Book a Clarity Call and let's start a conversation.